Hope is a good breakfast but a bad supper
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JOKE
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Pacient (suddenly comong out of coma) :Where am I- in Heaven?
Wife: No, darling I am still with you
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It takes all sort to make a world!
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One vampire to the other: " Let's go and have a drink. I know a cosy little mortuary just round the corner."
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Traveller: "Good morning, sir, can you let me have a room?
Hotel manager: "Yes, sir, you can have a room for four poundsor for three pounds."
Traveller: "What is the difference?"
Manager: "To tell you the truth, there is hardly any difference between them, but in the room at four pounds there are mouse-traps.
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Guest: What can you recommend me, waiter?I've got a tremendous appetite, but I've got only one shilling on me.
Waiter: I would recommend you to go to another restaurant.
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